Should I be concerned that a SkyNet van just dropped off my Amazon package?

Kinja'd!!! "CyborgAdaLovelace" (cyborgadalovelace)
09/15/2016 at 13:24 • Filed to: None

Kinja'd!!!4 Kinja'd!!! 17
Kinja'd!!!

To be clear, it was actually a person (or Terminator?) driving the van who handed me the package.


DISCUSSION (17)


Kinja'd!!! Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 13:29

Kinja'd!!!1

Well it was nice knowing you, I’m going to start building my bunker


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 13:31

Kinja'd!!!1

You should have used your cyborg abilities to fire a lazer at it or something, come on man!


Kinja'd!!! CyborgAdaLovelace > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
09/15/2016 at 13:32

Kinja'd!!!1

If you survive and find John Connor, please put in a good word for me.


Kinja'd!!! Stapleface > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 13:33

Kinja'd!!!1

Open this package if you want to live


Kinja'd!!! CyborgAdaLovelace > CalzoneGolem
09/15/2016 at 13:40

Kinja'd!!!0

There were two of them in the van. I didn’t wanna risk it.


Kinja'd!!! CalzoneGolem > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 13:41

Kinja'd!!!0

Smart move. Did you at least scan them?


Kinja'd!!! EL_ULY > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 13:41

Kinja'd!!!0


Kinja'd!!! shop-teacher > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 13:41

Kinja'd!!!0

Would anybody other than a Cyborg of Abe Lincoln know better how much trouble you’re in?

I’ve been enjoying the variety of delivery options that Amazon has been using. Recently I got a package from them delivered by a guy driving a rusty old Elantra. The trunk and back seat were stuffed to the ceiling with packages. Dude had a uniform and an ID badge from some delivery company, just no van.


Kinja'd!!! CyborgAdaLovelace > CalzoneGolem
09/15/2016 at 13:43

Kinja'd!!!1

The one that came to the door appeared to be baseline human, but some of these Terminators with their liquid metal and stuff I just can’t tell. Their tech is significantly newer than mine.


Kinja'd!!! CyborgAdaLovelace > shop-teacher
09/15/2016 at 13:48

Kinja'd!!!0

Terminators are tricky, though. Some of my tech is from the 1860's (in a parallel timeline, of course). Theirs is from the future.

This was the first time I’ve gotten an Amazon package delivered by somebody besides USPS or UPS. I did see a generic white van with Amazon magnetic signs on it the other day. We’re relatively close to an Amazon distribution hub, so it wouldn’t surprise me if they’re trying different logistics stuff in the area. Still waiting for the drones, of course.


Kinja'd!!! CyborgAdaLovelace > Stapleface
09/15/2016 at 13:51

Kinja'd!!!0

It was some card sleeves and deck boxes and some lingerie for my wife...not exactly the sort of thing that’s at the top of my “List of Useful Things for Surviving the Robot Apocalypse”.


Kinja'd!!! Stapleface > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 13:56

Kinja'd!!!0

I'm sure MacGyver could find a way to make a weapon out of those...


Kinja'd!!! You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much > Stapleface
09/15/2016 at 14:06

Kinja'd!!!1

Is it weird that I read this in Arnold’s accent?


Kinja'd!!! CyborgAdaLovelace > Stapleface
09/15/2016 at 14:07

Kinja'd!!!1

Undoubtedly. The deck boxes are a decently sturdy plastic. There’s elastic on one of the lingerie items. I could make a slingshot? Fortunately, I have my trusty Swiss Army Knife (a Tinker). I love that this exists:

http://www.macgyveronline.com/database/saks


Kinja'd!!! Stapleface > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 14:12

Kinja'd!!!1

I had no idea that existed. That's awesome.


Kinja'd!!! unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much
09/15/2016 at 14:37

Kinja'd!!!0

GET DOWN THERE’S A BOMB HUAGH UGH. GET DOWN AGAIN AGHHH.


Kinja'd!!! shop-teacher > CyborgAdaLovelace
09/15/2016 at 15:35

Kinja'd!!!1

Well, I don’t expect you to divulge your secrets.

I see a lot of Amazon’s vans, as well as several Enterprise rental vans delivering. I’m also seeing more and more “regular” vehicles. The rusty Elanta was the most WTF of them all.